Harry: [UI] you cooked all day Saturday.
Fritzy: Whattya talkin' about?
Harry: From our friend, I heard, I heard you did all the...
Fritzy: Yeah. Oh, yeah. Ya know, I was gonna go out there Sunday...
Harry: Yeah.
Fritzy: ...and all day Saturday. I made a, a pulpa, pulpa salad.
Harry: Yeah.
Fritzy: Beautiful I made it, ya know? And I went out shoppin', I bought some stuff that he wanted and I had, I still, it's all upstairs 'cause it's all cold, it's all them hard salamis and the cheeses, ya know? So I got that upstairs and I bought a load, I bought, uh, double-rib lamb chops with just the knobs, ya know, I had all the ends cut off.
Harry: Right.
Fritzy: And I bought a load of that, bought steaks. I was gonna ride. It's thunderin', rainin', and rainin'. I says, "But what am I gonna do out there?" I'm gonna take two hours to drive out there, then stay in a house for six hours and drive back for two hours. I says, "Nah."
Harry: You went out there to cook.
Fritzy: No, no. I says, "I ain't goin' out there." I wouldn't mind, ya know, there's nothin' to really, uh, cook about. But, uh, the ride. I hate the, ya know.
Harry: Ah, it's a long fuckin' ride.
Fritzy: I'm goin' to the, uh, state fair, Schenectady state fair.
Harry: Yeah?
Fritzy: Uh, Friday. My wi, my daughter's jumpin' in the events up there, ya know?
Harry: Oh, terrific.
Fritzy: Yeah, so we're gonna spend a coupla days up there.
Harry: Oh, that's nice.
Fritzy: Hey, I may buy a coupla hogs, there's a hog, uh, callin' contest. I may join that.
Harry: Yeah? And...
Fritzy: Yeah, you go in there, you call the hogs, ya know, like, you hoot and holler.
Harry: And then whattya do, you, you keep it?
Fritzy: You ever see them farmers, they got the hog callin' contest and all that there?
Harry: Oh, yeah, I know.
Fritzy: They, they make all kind of sounds. They get a prize, they get.
Harry: This guy, you, you gettin' to be like Morris. You gettin' to be a real farmer.
Fritzy: Yeah, I'm gettin', I just, in fact you just reminded me, I gotta call him up.
Harry: How's he doin'?
Fritzy: Eh, I haven't heard from him in a month. I gotta, I just got a message here, "Call Morris."
Harry: Is he, is he, is he still married, or what?
Fritzy: No.
Harry: He divorced again?
Fritzy: Yeah.
Harry: God bless 'em. [UI] my idol. Ya know, ya know, hey, tell him I want a picture, I want an autographed picture of him on my wall.
Fritzy: Yeah. I'm gonna tell him.
Harry: Fuckin' guy [UI] I'll tell ya. You know something?
Fritzy: Wha?
Harry: I wish I had his conscience.
Fritzy: Yeah, you're right. Ya know?
Harry: Jesus Christ.
Fritzy: You wouldn't wanna have his conscience.
Harry: No, I want it, because...
Fritzy: You want it?
Harry: ...my conscience is killing me.
Fritzy: No, look, good.
Harry: [UI]
Fritzy: You wouldn't want it. That, Harry, then you would be, you would be a lot like him and because of that there I got away from him. There's a lot of things I didn't like.
Harry: Yeah, but...
Fritzy: Yeah. So, uh, ya know...
Harry: Every time I see him...
Fritzy: So one goes, "Yeah, alright, fine." Ya know, one goes with the other. He gave his two jerk-offs jobs, alright? The other guy wants this business, he wants that. He went there, "Yeah, yeah, yeah." Now, another thing, he did ask, and I, he asked, he wanted to be a member of the, uh, uh, New York Athletic Club or somethin', ya know?
Harry: Right.
Fritzy: And, uh, Meade, "Alright, this." And Meade, nothin', nothin', nothin. The guy went, I don't know, he can't, I don't know if he can get membership or not there, ya know?
Harry: Who? Meade?
Fritzy: No, uh, Morris.
Harry: Sure he can.
Fritzy: No he can't.
Harry: Why?
Fritzy: He hasn't, uh, they, they haven't put him in.
Harry: Oh, no, but I'm sayin' Meade can get him in.
Fritzy: Yeah, Meade has done nothin'.
Harry: He won't do it?
Fritzy: No. I don't...
Harry: Ya know why he's mad at him?
Fritzy: Why?
Harry: Because he never gave him anything.
Fritzy: Yeah, but he was, but you losin' the point. He sat down with him, ya know?
Harry: Yeah.
Fritzy: To get somethin' from him. Morris is from the school, "You want somethin'? Give me somethin'. Now I'm askin' you for a favor. You askin' for work. When it comes up, I'll give it to ya." You follow?
Harry: Right.
Fritzy: "But right now I'm askin' you for a favor. Whattya waitin' to get work before you do me the favor?"
Harry: Yeah.
Fritzy: Ya know...
Harry: No, no. I'm, I'm from that school, too.
Fritzy: Ya know?
Harry: It doesn't have to be that day.
Fritzy: Right.
Harry: As long as you got an agreement.
Fritzy: Right, so long as you turn around and say, "Geez, let me, ya know, they were nice over here, this come up let me give it to them."
Harry: Hey, listen.
Fritzy: Wha?
Harry: I meant to ask him, "When's the next time you're gonna see this guy Tony Danza?"
Fritzy: Yeah, whattya want?
Harry: I'm, I'm, I, I want, I wanna, I'm gonna come there with a photographer.
Fritzy: Yeah?
Harry: I need a picture of him and I.
Fritzy: Yeah.
Harry: And then I needed, ya know, for him to sign the picture, uh, ya know, to, to, to my daughter Tina.
Fritzy: Yeah?
Harry: Uh.
Fritzy: Why you? Why not, uh, you come with Tina?
Harry: No, no, no. Hey, there's a reason for it.
Fritzy: Why?
Harry: And on the picture, he's gonna write, uh, ya know, "Dear Tina. You, you, ya know, your father's my, my good buddy and if he, and if he says for me to come over, I'll come over. Otherwise, I won't." Ya know, like that.
Fritzy: Ah, we'll bring him right over your house.
Harry: I wanna bust, I wanna bust some chops...
Fritzy: Look, here's what we'll do.
Harry: My kids love this guy so much.
Fritzy: Okay. Alright, ya know what I'll do? I'll make arrangements, the next time he's in town. I think he's filming now, he's doin' all that, uh, series, he's out west.
Harry: He's in California now.
Fritzy: But as soon as he, he was, Jesus, you shoulda mentioned somethin' during the summer, he was here.