Frank: Hello.
Fritzy: How are ya?
Frank: Hey, my man, I was just thinkin' about you.
Fritzy: You just gettin' up?
Frank: Ah, I'm up a while.
Fritzy: Yeah, how ya feel?
Frank: Not too bad.
Fritzy: They told me you spittin' blood?
Frank: Huh?
Fritzy: You spit blood?
Frank: Ah, about a month ago.
Fritzy: Ah, well that's a month ago. But you didn't, you didn't spit no more blood?
Frank: No.
Fritzy: Aha, well maybe it was in, just in your throat or somethin'. See 'cause...
Frank: [UI] I forgot to ask that woman what time I gotta go there.
Fritzy: Just call up.
Frank: Yeah, I call up and ask him.
Fritzy: Call now. I mean, ah, you got an appointment for Wednesday.
Frank: How do you feel?
Fritzy: What?
Frank: How do you feel?
Fritzy: I'm gonna tell you somethin' what I done. And you won't, you won't believe this here. But I'm gonna tell ya, and maybe I, I, don't know like, a, different people that have the problem if it's the same problem. But let me just tell you what I done. You know these gravity shoes, the ones where you hang on the pipe?
Frank: Yeah.
Fritzy: Okay, now I got that whole, my son has got that whole plank where ya, where ya hang on top and then you dangle, ya know?
Frank: That's good for ya.
Fritzy: Okay, wait'll I tell ya.
Frank: [UI]
Fritzy: Okay, but let me tell ya what I done. I tried it about four, five times. Nothin' worked, ya know, I hung [UI]. I hurt, I laid down. Nothin' really fuckin' worked. So what I did, then I had gotten sick, ya know my fuckin' [UI], I don't know, one thing on top of the other was goin'. Now, I told my wife, "Look," 'cause after Jerry the Rubber was tellin' me about they got a new thing, a harness, like they put instead of you turnin' upside down they put your body in a harness and you hang, like, uh, just in midair.
Frank: Hmm.
Fritzy: I says, "But that don't sound right." I says, "What's gonna pull the fuckin' weight?" [UI] when you put weight legs. Ya know, legs on your weight. I mean, uh, weights on your legs. I, I, says ya know what? I got the treadmill downstairs, ya know, and the big, big bar comes on top where you hang on, where you put your hands in front of you when you're walkin', ya know? I said I'm gonna get the gravity shoes, and I'm gonna, like, put it on that bar and then sit on the floor instead of hangin' all the way down. Least me head is level and my feet like I'm in, I'm in traction. So now I put the, my two feet up, I got two of the bars that I, I could pull on. I put, like I really, like I'm puttin' force to stretch my legs. The way you would crack your fingers in a knuckle, ya know?
Frank: Yeah.
Fritzy: And I'm pushin', all of a sudden I hear "bump-a-crack."
Frank: Yeah.
Fritzy: I [UI] and on the side where I got the trouble. I says, "Don't tell me." I says, "I hope maybe I put this fuckin' thing in place?"
Frank: Hmm.
Fritzy: And I, so I kept, ya know, the pressure on for about ten minutes, 15 minutes. I told my wife 'cause she was there when she heard the crack 'cause she, she hooked me up. I got off. Not a fuckin' pain, Frank.
Frank: Uh-huh.
Fritzy: Not a pain. I turned around, the first time I walked, I went, stood in the garage, I started doin' little fuckin' things, I was standin' up, that I could stand for a little length of time, ya know? I says, "Look at this fuckin' thing." I waited about three, about two hours, I went back on the thing again. No [UI] this time, just stretchin'. No pain all day, when I sat up, when I got up, I sat down. Nothin' all fuckin' day. I got a little pain, ya know, soreness I got. But no, none of that real, real, fuckin' pain. Last night I got in around one o'clock, I hung myself again.
Frank: Uh-huh.
Frank: This mornin' I got up, I done it again. Now I'm waitin'. I had lunch, I'm gonna do it now in 15 fuckin' minutes. Ya know?
Frank: [UI].
Fritzy: What?
Frank: [UI].
Fritzy: Do you know that, I think I put myself back in place?
Frank: Ya opened up the, whattya call it, there?
Fritzy: Whatever I done Frankie, somethin' happened. In other words, when you dangle and hang all by itself, it's not enough pressure. When I forced the, ya know, like the stretch.
Frank: As you get older.
Fritzy: Yeah.
Frank: As you get older. The vertebrae is the thing inside the cushion. They start to wear. Ya understand?
Fritzy: Yeah, but somethin' was turned. No, this is not wear.
Frank: Sometimes now, maybe you got a nerve pinched [UI].
Fritzy: That's what I had.
Frank: And maybe you opened it up and you pulled it out.
Fritzy: Maybe I did.
Frank: See you got it out.
Fritzy: Maybe I did. But I don't believe, this is the fuckin' first time in months, Frankie.
Frank: See, another thing is, number one you don't do no walkin', you get, you, you, you.
Fritzy: The car, the car, the car. The worst thing. The...
Frank: [UI] house?
Fritzy: Yeah.
Frank: You go into the car. You go to the store, you get in the car.
Fritzy: I know.
Frank: You go here, you get into the car.
Fritzy: I know.
Frank: See, I walk I have no car. I got rid of my car, goodbye.
Fritzy: I know, I know, I know.
Frank: I haven't got a car since 1965.
Fritzy: That's what I gotta do, get rid of the fuckin' car.
Frank: [UI].
Fritzy: But you see, you're in a city, it's a different ball game over there.
Frank: [UI] But when you gotta go to the store, walk.
Fritzy: I know.
Frank: Take a walk in the mornin'.
Fritzy: I know.
Frank: [UI] exercise your legs.
Fritzy: I know.
Frank: But you're always sittin' in that car. Boom, bidda-bing, bidda, bouncin'. Bing...
Fritzy: Yeah, this fuckin' car's got hard. I need shocks on the car, too.
Frank: Ya understand?
Fritzy: I know.
Frank: You're bouncin' and bouncin' and bouncin', and your back is, and your back is gettin' smaller and smaller, those cushions, they leave you shrinkin'.
Fritzy: You're right. I used to be six-foot-three.
Frank: Ya know what you're doin'? Know what you're doin' now? You stretched out your thing.
Fritzy: I know.
Frank: You stretched out the thing.
Fritzy: I know. I'm gonna, I'm gonna keep doin' it because I don't want it to go back.
Frank: [UI] Do that every day.
Fritzy: Every day, every day I, I, hey, if I could, if I got the cure here, pal. I could hump again. I'll be the Mad Humper I used to be.