EPISODE 8

Fritzy suspects his phone is bugged. Imagine that! Seems that Mrs. Giovanelli has been threatening to tap the line to expose her husband's philandering. Later, imagining how his wife will feel when he meets his maker, Fritzy breaks out the dancing shoes. Look out Nathan Lane! (8:13)

FRITZY: Federico "Fritzy" Giovanelli
FRANK: Frank "Frankie California" Condo
UI: Unintelligible

Frank: Hello my [UI], how are you?

Fritzy: Dinty Moore's beef stew.

Frank: Dinty Moore? What'd you buy it in the can?

Fritzy: Nah, nah, nah, homemade.

Frank: Huh?

Fritzy: Homemade, homemade.

Frank: You musta mixed it.

Fritzy: What mixed it? I don't mix. I, I come from the ground. I start from the floor.

Frank: How's everything there?

Fritzy: Hey.

Frank: Is it safe to talk? You might have a bug in the house.

Fritzy: I got one up my ass. She, she you know something? She's didn't bug, I find out the story. On a Sunday, when I was over here...

Frank: Yeah.

Fritzy: ...'Cause I called her everything. I says, "You the lowest form of a person. To do somethin' like that, to put a tap." I says, "I turn around," I says, "I had too much dignity, I could have found out who's causing me trouble three years ago, who you talk, who you chat." I says, "I never done that there because I, I don't wanna invade the privacy of my children," I says. You know, who knows, the kid is talkin' and whatnot. I wasn't gonna, you know what I mean?

Frank: Yeah.

Fritzy: Start to do that there. I wasn't a prying parent like that, I didn't do that to the, you know, to that way, to go that way. I says, "And that's why I didn't listen in, but you done..." That [UI] she says, "I, well I didn't tap it. I only listened in. On that Sunday morning, I went outside from the basement to take Carolann [Fritzy's daughter, a young equestrian] to the horses. I went back upstairs to get something that Carolann forgot and I went upstairs, opened the door and went in and I heard you talkin'," she said, "'cause was I gonna call down when I opened up the uh, the [UI] I heard you talkin' on the phone, I picked up the phone and I listened to the conversation." Alright?

Frank: Huh.

Fritzy: In the meantime, oogatz. Oogatz. Alright.

Frank: Why'd she go listen to the conversation?

Fritzy: She said she heard me talking on the phone downstairs, she heard me talkin'. The fuck [UI]. She's fuckin', her brain was just constantly fuckin' moving how to fuckin' trap me. "Let me see which way, I'll go out, come back in, see whatever I gotta do." It's in her fuckin' head. You know [UI] I didn't argue [UI]. [UI] Today it loosened up a little bit. You wanna know somethin'? I, I been feeling woozy.

Frank: He's feelin' woozy now.

Fritzy: Well, you know I hollered.

Frank: The nerves, huh?

Fritzy: Fuckin' you know...

Frank: The nerves are goin' up.

Fritzy: Sure, sure you know. Well, she's been the cause of my fuckin' trouble. I know where the trouble came, for ten years.

Frank: Yeah. Did Geronimo call her?

Fritzy: Who?

Frank: Geronimo.

Fritzy: Geronimo?

Frank: The big giant.

Fritzy: I don't know.

Frank: You didn't ask her?

Fritzy: No. We're not talking, what the fuck am I gonna ask her?

Frank: Well, you coulda asked her that, you coulda says, "Did Tony call ya?"

Fritzy: Well, I'll ask her that tonight.

Frank: Uh-huh.

Fritzy: I'll ask her that. But she didn't say a fuckin' word.

Frank: No, huh?

Fritzy: She's after me and you.

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